Coupon Sherpa's Excruciating Guide to Coupon Protocol

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Kmart

Sam's Club

"Miss Manners Guide to Excruciatingly Correct Behavior" is 838-pages long, and yet there's not one word in the entire tome about coupon etiquette. If there was such a section, I might have lobbed it at the lady in front of me at the supermarket yesterday when she pulled out a stack of disorganized, mostly expired coupons after eying the single box of cereal I was attempting to purchase.

Thus, I'm taking it upon myself to update Miss Manners with the following Excruciating Guide to Coupon Protocol.

1. Evaluate the coupon’s appearance.
Valid online coupons look very similar to those you find in the Sunday newspaper and should include a color picture of the product, a description of the product, the manufacturer’s legal notice, an expiration date, a bar code.

2. Cut out online coupons after printing.
Cashiers appreciate the clipped versions of a coupon as they won't have to stuff a whole sheet of paper into their drawer.

3. Be courteous in line.
Let the next person in line know you're going to be using multiple coupons. They may decide to move to a different check out or, at minimum, will appreciate the warning. Some who follow your savings will be astonished when the cashier hits total.

4. Don't scan or photocopy coupons.
This applies to both newspaper and online coupons. Online printable coupons have a unique code, much like a fingerprint, and it's illegal to copy them. You can legally make multiple copies of some online coupons, but each copy should have a unique access or security code.

5. Don't use coupons you received via email.
This too may be illegal, unless you have knowingly registered to receive online coupons at a manufacturer or credible coupon Web site.

6. Follow the rules.
If you have a grocery coupon that requires you to buy two items to get the discount, you must buy two items. If you have a coupon that says "good only on 3-pound size," you must purchase the 3-pound size to get the discount. If a coupon is expired and the store doesn't accept expired coupons, don't whine to use it.

7. One per customer.
Some companies offer coupons for one per household or one per person. This means you may only use one coupon for your entire family. One per person means one per person, not one per everyone in the house, your best friend and your goldfish.

8. Organize your coupons before you reach the register.
Not only does this speed up the process, it ensures you receive all your savings.

9. Don't clear the shelf.
We all like a good bargain but it's incredibly irritating to see a person grabbing everything from the shelf of a hot sale item. Leave some for others and make repeat visits, if necessary. You might call and ask staff to set aside an order for you, if you have a particularly good relationship with a store.

10. Be a coupon fairy.
Don't trash those unwanted coupons. Take them with you and, as you walk down the aisles, put the coupons on the appropriate shelves for the next shopper to use. You'll make someone's day and earn yourself a gold star. You don't have to see someone smile to enjoy it.

11. Buy during the off hours.
If you're making a big haul and plan on using many coupons, avoiding prime shopping time avoids frustrating other shoppers and cashiers. It's also much more pleasant and faster to shop the off hours.

12. Using peelies.
Most people agree it's okay to remove a peel-off (peelie) coupon from one item and use it on another "eligible" item. Others think this is wrong. It's up to you, but it's incredibly rude to remove more than one or two peelies.

13. Restaurant Coupon Etiquette. Read the terms of the coupon before you use it. For example, "buy-one-appetizer, get-one-free" usually require the coupon applies to the less expensive appetizer only. Or the terms may apply only to specific menu items or during specific hours. Let the server know you have a coupon before ordering and remember to tip them based on the total bill without the coupon deduction.

14. Be polite to others in line.
Allow shoppers with only a few items to go ahead of you in line. Coupons take time.

15. Always be polite to the cashier.
Just because you end up with an incredibly rude or dumb cashier doesn't mean you have to be incredibly rude. Rudeness, as Miss Manners would say, is never appropriate. Consider the cashier's point of view and, if you must, go over the cashier's head to resolve a problem. The supervisor will be more willing to help you out if you've kept a level head. You'll also feel much better, as well.